Molly: Selfish to Selfless
My most recent interview with a Rocky Mountain Treatment Center graduate was with Molly. At the time we met, she had been sober for four months for the first time in many years. She is one incredibly enthusiastic woman about recovery.
Molly shared with me that she truly believes she was born alcoholic. From her earliest memories, she thought that she was always pushed for success and spent most of her time trying to be what she thought everybody else wanted her to be. She felt that whatever she did, it just wasn’t good enough, she wasn’t good enough. That’s a tough way to grow up and I could relate.
Molly started young. She explained she was a blackout drinker from the very beginning, from the age of 16 on. Within a couple of years, she had moved on to a pretty powerful cocaine addiction. She smoked weed like cigarettes. All of her relationships were predicated on using. They were using relationships; they were bad relationships. Despite a heavy addiction, she did complete college and went to work as a professional. But as with most of us, she inexorably came to the point where she could no longer foresee a life worth living. She only lived to drink and to drink was to die. That’s when the self-sabotage ended.
Molly entered Rocky Mountain Treatment Center on New Year’s Day 2018. She had a very long detox, a whole week before her body became adjusted to the absence of chemicals. I asked Molly what she found to be the biggest struggles in treatment. She pointed out three: anxiety, ego issues and the God stuff. Ultimately, the struggle with the God stuff turned out to be the answer to all three. She came to the disheartening conclusion that she had lived her whole life selfishly and still ended up empty no matter what she did and decided to no longer live like that. She learned the hard way that unless she developed and enlarged her spiritual life, she wasn’t going to make it.
Within a couple months of finishing treatment and still unemployed, she was told by people in the program that if she wanted to enhance her spiritual experience, she should volunteer with those less fortunate than her, that it would help with her gratitude. She went to the local homeless shelter to volunteer and ended up getting a job there as the Volunteer Coordinator. Bam! Instant miracle! She now bolsters her recovery daily by giving to others first and living a life of service. Molly went from being deathly ill to spiritually well in less than six months. Wonderful! She went from being selfish to selfless and that is what allowed her to get better. She made some pretty awesome lemonade from her life’s lemons, and I have no reason to believe that she will not continue to do so as her adventurous life continues to unfold.
As I always do, I asked Molly if she could send out a message to those that still suffer, what would it be? She succinctly shared the following three statements:
“You’re never alone. There is a Higher Power in your life whether you know it or not. Praise God for your struggles.”
Good golly, Miss Molly, I like how you’re doing this!
James A. Francetich is a freelance writer and author. The opinions expressed are solely of the author and do not represent any community based recovery programs, private or public entities or any governmental agencies.